#18 #justbepoly (#hannahratemybumblebee)
Summary
Our much anticipated Jealousy Episode! We answer YOUR questions from all over the Social Meteors (Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Email, and… Whisper?) about jealousy in relationships. Chastain is a Relationship Coach and is qualified to provide advice in these matters. Everyone else is a human being who has felt jealous in relationships and lived to tell the tale. You should absolutely take what feels right to you from the Pod Pod Cvlt Cast, and leave the rest. Thank you to everyone who submitted questions!
A quick note: By the end of this episode we were a little loopy from all of the sincerity and we would very much like it if you would send pictures of your bumble bees to Hannah on Twitter: @PodPodCvltCast Hashtag: #HannahRateMyBumbleBee
Content Warning: Domestic Violence. Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 (US)
Terms of Note
Here are some terms and phrases we use in this podcast and links to articles we find informative. If we say something unfamiliar to you, please drop us a line on Twitter @podpodcvltcast FB /podpodcvltcast or email: thepod@podpodcvltcast.com Check out episode #1, #2, #3, #4,or #5 for some basic polyamory and kink terms.
- Jealousy
- Envy
- Triggers
- Red Flags & Toxic Behaviors
- Veto Power
- Yoga Nidra
- Relationship Agreement
- Do Some People Never Get Jealous?
- How To Ask A Partner For An Exclusive Relationship
- How To Communicate Needs In A Relationship
- Minimizing Emotions
- Jealousy in Polyamory
- Recovering from Abuse in Past Relationships
- Domestic Violence Resources
The Pod’s “In The Moment” Coping Skills for Jealous Feelings (for Anna)
Max: Changes his environment and talks to friends about the feelings. He waits until he is calm to engage with his partner, if at all. This helps him avoid conflict because his jealous feeling may or may not be based in reality at the time. Being tired/hungy/intoxicated can make following this plan harder for him and he is more likely to have an argument
Hannah: In the moment she feels anxious, lonely, and distraught because her feelings of jealousy are about quality time. She used to throw herself into random dates to distract herself when partners weren’t available. Communication is important and knowing what is going on brings her comfort. She sometimes feels like she isn’t a good partner if she doesn’t have a lot going on. Distraction works well for her. Scheduling time to worry about things and putting feelings aside might be things that will help
Erik: Needs a code switch… ie… Season 2 of “The Wire” (not sponsored) . Or a long drive. He enjoys driving winding roads. Escapism, nature, and revisiting comforting things help him process.
Chastain: Feels anxious and like she’s not good enough. She has to leave the situation, but sucks at removing herself from the situation. She ruminates on where she went wrong or what went wrong. She uses her self care buddy and list of emergency contact friends to process. She does not process difficult feelings with partners until she is in a later draft and calmer place.
Pod Pod Cvlt Cast Wisdom…?
- Jealousy is normal in relationships
- Communicate with your partners
- Everything ends, including relationships
- Envious of and jealous about
- Be honest in relationships with tact
- Create clear boundaries about transparency
- Create a relationship agreement
Resources & References
- New Affiliate: Instacart
- 2019 Listener Survey
Credits & Contact
- Hosts: Max, Chastain, Hannah, & Erik
- Website: www.podpodcvltcast.com
- Email: thepod@podpodcvltcast.com
- Title Music: “Spencer – Bluegrass” by Lobo Loco
- Midroll Music: “The Point Break” by Pale Blue/Goberino
- Affiliate Music: “Earth, Our Dear Planet” by Pale Blue/Goberino
Social Meteors
- Instagram: @cvltwithav
- Twitter: @PodPodCvltCast
- Facebook: @PodPodCvltCast
- Patreon: Pod Pod Cvlt Cast
- YouTube: Pod Pod Cvlt Cast
- Tumblr: /podpodcvlcast
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